so imperfect, yet so beautiful

I'm just going to assume everybody reading this isn't a damn size2.... I don't know about anyone else but going from high school short shorts and low cut jeans to age 22 jeans and wanting to pull them up a little higher (ya know so that you can hide a little more buldge that way RIGHT?!)  I went from playing in a full spandex uniform in high school to swearing I would never even lay my hands on anything spandex... seriously you can't hide anything in spandex.... every roll, every dimple, every scar shows... who invented spandex? he had probably already been killed.
It makes me sick watching TV... because don't lie, you like me compare yourself to EVERYONE....
~hmmm I wonder if my legs look that awful in shorts?
~ damn do my boobs show that much cleavage in a low cut shirt?
~ ugh do I look like that in my skinny jeans?
yes yes yes. man I swore I would never wear skinny jeans... now their my favorite! like I tell people I have the perfect hourglass shape.... except I have a little more sand in the bottom of my hourglass :)
Everyone is self concious, I use to never ever mention it. But after talking to friends, coworkers, family.... I'm not the only one. Wouldn't it be nice to just put something on and just feel like you look sexy? Ya maybe if I got dressed drunk.
I honestly believe our society has given the female body a bad image. I love seeing a woman whos a size 12 and is absolutely beautiful. I believe a woman should have soft curves.... not flat ripped abs... not defined arms....not huge defined legs.  And since society has given way to how a woman's body should look like, it seems almost unrealistic to be "beautiful".  I just pray that if I ever end up with a teenage girl I can make sure she knows shes beautiful, and that it is very important to eat healthy and to be active and exercise but that always doesn't show on the outside. I know when I wake up in my morning I'm going to have thighs that touch, a stomach that doesn't feel like a brick, and a chin that might look like a double chin when I laugh really hard with my girlfriends.
Drives me crazy when I'm at the gym working my ass off and I look over at a skinny little girl who might make it to the gym once a week to do her 'god awful' workout of walking 5 minutes and doing crunches! for real?!?! sometimes i want to go over and crank their treadmill up to about 15... there now your working your ass off how does it feel? oh no did you sweat!!! you poor thing! you might actually have to shower after leaving the gym.... haha
Shopping and I have a love/hate relationship. I love finding clothes that fit and look too darn cute to pass up. But I HATE when I grab the size I ussually wear, take it into the dressing room, then can't get it over my shoulder, boobs, hips, etc.... WHAT?! shouldn't sizes be universal to prevent mini breakdowns in dressing rooms worldwide?!? that incidence right there ussually ruins a shopping trip... thats why now I've started grabbing bigger sizes...yeah thats right I grab at least 2 sizes bigger than what I think I am then I feel good when I put it on and its huge YAY (pretty pathetic huh?) lol but it really sucks when that size too big acctually turns out being the perfect size...perfect......
But at the end of the day.... Devin will love me no matter what. I could gain 20 lbs, loose 20 lbs, and he will still find me incredibly beautiful just like he always has. And they say guys are dumb?! :)