where to even begin...

sending balloons to Chance

I have no idea how your first blog should begin...... here is how mine will. My <future> sister in law started a blog and I thought that would be a great idea. I don't keep a jounal because most my thoughts I don't mind to be public, what do I have to hide? The past 2 weeks have been the most trying time of my faith I believe. A good friend of mine was just diagnosed with stage 5 leaukemia, aboslutely crazy to me. She would have graduated from nursing school in 2 months. I have been thinking and thinking about my own life, she is really young. I'm 22, I don't know if, when, or how something like that would happen to me or someone I care deeply about. Like I've heard time and time again, don't take life for granted, because <really> you don't know how much time you have here. That leads me to sad story number dos, another friend of mine from nursing school (ya I know, maybe I need to drop out? :) lol. But Miriam and her husband Mark found out there were expecting last summer, they were thrilled, as were we. A few months into pregnancy they found out that the baby was diagnosed with anencephaly. After it was confirmed she was given the toughest decision, terminate or not. They were both told that if the baby made it through birth that the infant might not live long or live with a debillitating condition. This was so tragic to them, but they felt like god gave them this baby for a reason, and that reason they were going to find out. They later found out the little baby was a boy, and they named that baby Chance. I've heard from numerous people "why would she keep the baby" "why would she put herself through that". I have no doubt that the decision they made was the best decision, I can't lie, at one point I wondered the same thing. But the day I held Chance I knew why they made that decision.... it was because not only was he a gift from god but he was an inspiration to all of us. He only lived for 20 min, but in that 20 min I saw how much love had accumulated for this little guy. I had a 9month relationship with him :) as did everyone else in that room that day. I feel like if you aren't capable of going through what Miriam did, then you aren't ready to possibly love a child as much as they should be loved. They had hope of bringing him home, but they also knew that the statistics were playing against them. I learned so much that week, I can't even possibly begin to explain my view change of so many things. I know that one day Miriam and Chance will meet again and when that time comes, he will be a perfect little angel she had always dreamt of holding since that day....... RIP Chance Young feb 18 2011